&shaneroth;

Sometimes

The good in those around you can envelope the bad thoughts inside of you, and you can just breathe.

Rehearsal wasn’t great.
But this too shall pass…

Oh and thanks again. You barely did anything but it seemed like everything.

And now…. I drive.

it’s 3 o’clock in the morning.

and I can’t sleep.
because I keep closing my eyes, drifting off into dreamland, and you show up.

you’re beautiful.

but I can’t let it happen. I can’t go through with a dream with you in it. because I know it is a dream.

when I’m awake, there’s no chance. It just doesn’t make sense. There’s just too much wrong, and not even what I want to be right will seem enough, what would people think if they knew how I felt? So many labels, ugly stares, unforgiving looks.  

Why should I put myself through the torture of being happy with you in a dream?

it’s not something that can ever happen when I wake up.

and that in itself is torture.

I just wish you would really look at me like you did before I jolted awake.

Even if you did, what would they say?

it’s hopeless. 

No wise man ever wished to be younger.

But I am not wise.
And I do wish I were younger.
Just a couple years.
But I’m not.

Who am I kidding, it wouldn’t make a difference if I were younger…

Ughhh

Single’s Awareness Day.

I was fully confident that today would not in the slightest upset me.

It’s just another day I don’t have to spend money on a girl.

I did buy myself a mophie case for my iPhone though….. Happy…. Singles day?

Idk. It wasn’t an issue until I started making sushi for all these wonderful couples today…

It made me wish I had that connection. Something real. Something I thought I’d had before but maybe I never have.

Regardless its making me miss a lot of things and someone, and wish for a lot of things and it’s not exactly the mood I want.

I want a valentine..